For some reason, I find myself sitting here thinking about all of the people that have come in and out of my life over the past 30 years. Thinking of how they entered, how they exited, and how they remain a part of the life I live. I'm thinking of all of the times we have been there for each other, all of the times we have let each other down, all of the times we were faced with situations that were difficult, and the times that we thought nothing would come in between us. I wonder why certain things happened and how we end up in certain situations. All of it comes down to one word. Decisions.
What drives us to make the decisions that we do? Every single aspect of our life comes down to a decision that we or someone else has made. Think about it. One single decision could change your life. One decision could change the life of someone else. Everything we do has an impact on others, even when we don't realize it. Because, somehow, we are all connected. It's beautiful, ironic, scary, majestic, and somewhat unfair all at the same time.
Looking back, I wonder why in the world people have made some of the decisions that they did. How could they not see what it would do to themselves? To others? I wonder the exact same thing about myself and some of my decisions.
I'm starting to realize that it all boils down to the fact that we are selfish. All of us. Maybe we don't want to be, or mean to be, but we are human. We don't want to be the vulnerable one. We don't want to be the one to get "one upped". We don't want to be wrong. We don't want to be the one who fails. We don't want to be the one to love the most. We don't want to be the "stupid" or "naive" one. We don't want to be the one to give up or the one to be stubborn. We care way too much about ourselves and what everyone thinks of us, and not enough about each other.
Or maybe I'm wrong. About some of us, or even all of us. Maybe the problem isn't selfishness and the problem is fear. Fear of being the vulnerable one. Fear of being wrong. Fear of being "one upped" or the one to love the most. Fear of giving up too easily or not giving up soon enough. Fear of being hurt or making the wrong choice.
I guess ultimately it doesn't matter how we got to where we are, or why we make the decisions that we do. I guess what matters is that we make the most of each and every situation and that we learn from the mistakes and the difficult times. I guess what matters is that we try our best to not let selfishness or fear guide our lives, but that we turn to God and let him be the decision maker. Maybe, if we thought more along those lines, and had faith that He has a plan and a reason for everything, we would be much better off.
Food for thought from the random mind of me....
Tuesday, November 3, 2015
Sunday, October 18, 2015
Trust Without Borders
I wrote this blog post in February. I guess I planned on writing more, but I like it how it is....
Life can be scary. It can be beautiful and exciting. It can be overwhelming. It can be a combination of so many things. I don't think it's uncommon for us to feel like we are caught in a riptide and moments....seconds away from drowning. Especially in the generation and world that we live in.
Whether we are believers and/or followers of Christ or not, He has a plan for us. He is leading us in a certain direction and wants us to experience certain things. Sometimes the places we find ourselves are frightneing and overwhelming. Maybe we followed His calling to these situations, or maybe this is where we find Him. Either way, He has something to do with how we got here and the only way to keep our heads above water is to call on Him for guidance and direction. The only way we can do that is to trust Him. But here's the catch...."without borders".
Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding."
Life can be scary. It can be beautiful and exciting. It can be overwhelming. It can be a combination of so many things. I don't think it's uncommon for us to feel like we are caught in a riptide and moments....seconds away from drowning. Especially in the generation and world that we live in.
Whether we are believers and/or followers of Christ or not, He has a plan for us. He is leading us in a certain direction and wants us to experience certain things. Sometimes the places we find ourselves are frightneing and overwhelming. Maybe we followed His calling to these situations, or maybe this is where we find Him. Either way, He has something to do with how we got here and the only way to keep our heads above water is to call on Him for guidance and direction. The only way we can do that is to trust Him. But here's the catch...."without borders".
Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding."
Thursday, January 1, 2015
A Year in Review
2014
I've laughed. I've cried. I've stumbled, fallen, and risen against the odds. There have been friendships lost, wounded, strengthened, and formed. Life has been taken and also created. I've witnessed my family separate, relationships crumble, and watched many of the people I love experience heartache that they do not deserve. There have been marriages, engagements, and divorces. I've learned that with faith and effort anything is possible, and if you are willing to see it...something positive always comes out of the difficult times we go through. I've realized that nothing in this world is more important than God, true friends, and family. People will often disappoint you if you expect too much from them. No one can make you happy other than yourself. Point being: there have been many ups and downs, positives and negatives, mistakes made, lessons learned, etc.
I think the one thing that sticks out the most for me from 2014 is the power of prayer. I have always had a love for God and strived to be who He wants me to become. However, I have always struggled in this area. I still do, and I'm sure that I still will. This year, though, I have found myself praying much more frequently. I've prayed for God to heal my broken heart and to mend all of the scars that have been developed over the last 29 years. I have prayed for guidance and direction. I've prayed for forgiveness for myself and for God to help me to forgive others that have hurt me in some way. I've prayed to thank Him for continuing to bless and provide for me, even when I don't always deserve it. I think the prayer I have prayed the most this year is for His will to be done in my life, and for Him to show me- no questions asked or unsureness about it- what path to take so that I am certain I'm following HIS plan for my life and not my own. That is both the scariest and best thing I have ever done. We are humans. We are Americans. We live in the 21st century. We like to be in control. That is not a prayer to take lightly, and if you don't truly mean it....you will not see the blessings of it in full effect.
I honestly believe that because of this prayer, I am where I am supposed to be. I am happier than I have been in a very long time. I am more conscious of my flaws and mistakes, and use them to help me improve my relationships and character. I hope that if you are reading this, you don't take it as me bragging or thinking that I am better than you in any way. I'm only sharing this because, if you know me, you have probably seen a pretty big change in me over the last year. (Hopefully, in a good way.) This year hasn't been the easiest, but I really have been blessed and I wouldn't change a minute of it. I am so thankful for all of the things I have been through, lessons I have learned, and people that have been a part of it.
Here is to a new year filled with many more blessings to all of us! I love you all and don't forget to laugh today! :)
<3 heather="" p="">
I've laughed. I've cried. I've stumbled, fallen, and risen against the odds. There have been friendships lost, wounded, strengthened, and formed. Life has been taken and also created. I've witnessed my family separate, relationships crumble, and watched many of the people I love experience heartache that they do not deserve. There have been marriages, engagements, and divorces. I've learned that with faith and effort anything is possible, and if you are willing to see it...something positive always comes out of the difficult times we go through. I've realized that nothing in this world is more important than God, true friends, and family. People will often disappoint you if you expect too much from them. No one can make you happy other than yourself. Point being: there have been many ups and downs, positives and negatives, mistakes made, lessons learned, etc.
I think the one thing that sticks out the most for me from 2014 is the power of prayer. I have always had a love for God and strived to be who He wants me to become. However, I have always struggled in this area. I still do, and I'm sure that I still will. This year, though, I have found myself praying much more frequently. I've prayed for God to heal my broken heart and to mend all of the scars that have been developed over the last 29 years. I have prayed for guidance and direction. I've prayed for forgiveness for myself and for God to help me to forgive others that have hurt me in some way. I've prayed to thank Him for continuing to bless and provide for me, even when I don't always deserve it. I think the prayer I have prayed the most this year is for His will to be done in my life, and for Him to show me- no questions asked or unsureness about it- what path to take so that I am certain I'm following HIS plan for my life and not my own. That is both the scariest and best thing I have ever done. We are humans. We are Americans. We live in the 21st century. We like to be in control. That is not a prayer to take lightly, and if you don't truly mean it....you will not see the blessings of it in full effect.
I honestly believe that because of this prayer, I am where I am supposed to be. I am happier than I have been in a very long time. I am more conscious of my flaws and mistakes, and use them to help me improve my relationships and character. I hope that if you are reading this, you don't take it as me bragging or thinking that I am better than you in any way. I'm only sharing this because, if you know me, you have probably seen a pretty big change in me over the last year. (Hopefully, in a good way.) This year hasn't been the easiest, but I really have been blessed and I wouldn't change a minute of it. I am so thankful for all of the things I have been through, lessons I have learned, and people that have been a part of it.
Here is to a new year filled with many more blessings to all of us! I love you all and don't forget to laugh today! :)
<3 heather="" p="">
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